Dating Advice For Women
Dating Tips: So you’ve met this wonderful man/woman through a mutual friend or perhaps from doing a little online dating.  This person is just fantastic. Great personality, great looks, funny, caring – the whole package.  You’ve been seeing a lot of one another the past few weeks and everything seems to be going smoothly.  There isn’t any label on it yet, but you assume that before too long the both of you will cease to be singles and will begin to consider the relationship as “serious.”  That’s how the process works.  You meet, you flirt, you see if you are right for one another, and then you date. 

But, now it’s early-to-mid November.  Perhaps you’ve just recently started to “seriously” date. And while things are going smoothly, it is all still very new.  You plan on going home to your parents’ house for Thanksgiving.  Your partner, on the other hand, lives too far away to attend his/her own family’s Thanksgiving get-together.  You’re torn.  You want to invite him/her to your parents’ house, but maybe the timing just isn’t right.  Too soon to introduce?

We discussed this once before, but as the holidays draw near we felt it couldn’t hurt to address, once again.  Online Dating Questions of the Season: How soon is too soon?  What are you risking?  What is to be lost, and what is to be gained?

In the early stages of a relationship, some things may be uncertain.  At the beginning of the dating process there is certainly plenty of “rocky terrain” to be traversed.   However, introducing your boyfriend/girlfriend to your family can be a strong “shot in the arm”, hoisting you up and over this difficult path and dropping you down comfortably on the other side.  In other words, introducing your new boyfriend/girlfriend to your parents will turn up the relationship meter pretty dramatically.  If you feel you’re prepared to go from a 3 to an 8 overnight – then by all means – go for it.  If however, you aren’t comfortable with a jump of that size at this moment … well then perhaps you should reconsider the invite.

What if you aren’t ready for that kind of a relationship commitment?  What if (unbeknownst to you) the relationship isn’t destined to work out?  What if it is all just a big dating mistake, introducing your family to this person?  When is it perhaps a good idea to take things slow, saving the “show and tell” for another time and place?

There aren’t always clear indicators informing us: “yes, you should do this” or “no, you shouldn’t do this.”  Sometimes you just have to take a guess, or just do what you feel is right.  Other times you just have to do what you want to do; to hell with the consequences.  Depending on your personality, you may throw caution to the wind in more instances than others.  If you feel that bringing your new boyfriend/girlfriend home with you would be a fun idea – then go ahead and do it.  So what if it doesn’t work out.  That doesn’t mean that in one evening, you can’t have fun.  Enjoy some laughs with your family and your new close friend.  One major word of warning though, make sure your family knows what your “situation” is before they meet this new person.  If you think it might be serious, then say so.  If you aren’t certain, then just say the two of you are friends.  Managing the expectations and perceptions of your family will go a long way in protecting yourself from pain, frustration or confusion in the future.

So, I guess the moral of the story is: go ahead and bring your new boyfriend/girlfriend to Thanksgiving dinner.  Just do it.  Be mindful of how your family will react, of course, but honestly what is the worst that could happen.  If it doesn’t work out – that’s fine.  It is one night, two or three max - if you decide to make a long weekend out of it.  It’s just a bit of fun, and doesn’t HAVE to mean anything specific.  Still, it could be the perfect opportunity for you to turn a new, budding relationship into a beautiful strong connection or love.

Happy Holidays everyone, and of course, Happy Dating!

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