Dating For Singles
So you’re single.  You live by yourself, or maybe with a friend or two in a major city.  You have a tight-knit group of friends, who in turn have other friends and so on.  Your web of secondary and tertiary friends is wide and full of an interesting assortment of individuals.  Still, having hung out or partied with most of them at one point or another, you just don’t get the feeling that there is a “special someone” in that grouping.  So, what do you do?  You go out and meet new people.  You make more connections, in hopes that the next connection you make either is or leads to your soul mate. 

Now, the way I see it “the second you STOP looking, is the second you START finding.”  It’s when you aren’t actively looking for a job that the best one plops into your lap.  It’s when you aren’t hungry that your favorite restaurant decides to give away free food to anyone passing by.  It’s when you aren’t looking for a boyfriend/girlfriend that Mr. or Ms. Right moves in next door.  That’s the way the world works…at least for me.  Still, the voice in your head screaming “I want to be with someone” can be difficult to silence.  You want to find someone to spend time with, to be with, to hold, and to have to hold you.  There isn’t anything wrong with that.  It’s natural.  Do you really think that you’re going to find this type of person at a bar though?    Sure it’s possible, but aren’t there other, more appropriate places you can go? 

Well, I’m glad you asked.  Here is Stella’s list of the top 4 places to go to meet new people.  Either for friendship…or love.  By the way, these items are listed in no particular order, so if one doesn’t work out for you, don’t hesitate to try any or all of the other 3.

* Church, Synagogue, Temple, Place of Worship

When you’re at a bar, morals are often checked at the door.  You go to a bar to drink and party and be loud.  You go to a bar to be debaucherous.  You go to church, however, to find strength…to be refreshed…to be enlightened.  It may not be for everyone, but for those who find sanctuary in the church, it can be a great place to meet well rounded, intelligent, kind, beautiful people who share at least one of the same interests that you do.

* Dance/Yoga Class

Guys let me be clear – picking up girls at the gym is very rarely a good idea.  You’ll come across as a creep.  Trust me; I’ve seen it happen thousands of times before.  Women go to the gym for the same reason men go to the gym…to work out.  They sweat, they stink, they tire themselves out – the last thing they want is to be ogled.  However, the same is not always the case during small, intimate dance or yoga sessions.  In some cases, women can be impressed and enamored by a guy who isn’t afraid to leave his shame at the door and give it his all.  Play it cool, and take it slow.  Introduce yourself; make some friends, and who knows – before long maybe they’ll be asking if you’re free for a drink.

* Speaking of leaving your shame at the door, why not try an improv acting class? 

Laugh a little, let your self have some fun, and meet some great people in the mean-time.  It can be stressful, but only if you let the fear get the better of you.  So what if you fail, so what if you look stupid.  In many cases, the point of improv exercises IS to look stupid.  So get out there already!

* What’s cuter than a puppy?  NOTHING, that’s what! 

Take your dog on a walk in the park and see what happens.  Spark a conversation with another dog owner about training tips.  Let the two dogs get to know one another, while the owners do the same.  Don’t have a dog, borrow one from a friend.  Just make sure if asked, that you explain that it isn’t your dog, but your friend’s instead, else you might fall into a lie that you will be embarrassed to fess up to later on.

So, get out there and meet some new people.  There is someone out there for you, you just have to find ‘em.

Good luck, and happy dating!

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